Swallowed
by Goddess Isa
Summary: A non-B/A Homecoming fic! Yea me!


TITLE: Swallowed  
AUTHOR: Goddess Isa  
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com  
SUMMARY: Homecoming fic! Yea me!  
SPOILER: Homecoming  
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =) http://planetslaythis.homestead.com is my site  
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P  
RATING: TV-PG  
DISCLAIMER: Slayerettes and Sunnydale = Joss. Depressed, bitter, angry, depressed, bitter and angry = me Swallowed = Bush. Gavin Rossdale = HOT.   
  
  
  
//Warm sun   
  
Feed me up   
I'm leery   
Loaded up   
  
Loathing   
  
For a change   
  
And I slip some   
  
Boil away\\   
  
  
The dance is in full swing. Where did that term come from? The 1920's? Because nothing is actually swinging. The Dingoes have been playing hard rock all night, mostly covers, because Oz says they've been lazy lately. I'm so afraid he can see it in my eyes. He seems to be able to tell strange things about me. Like the other night when he picked up my hand and told me I had a headache. Strange things like that.   
  
I hope he can't tell. Xander is next to me and our legs are almost touching.   
  
I want them to touch.   
  
I want to touch a lot more than his leg to mine   
  
  
//Swallowed   
  
Followed   
  
Heavy about everything but my love   
  
Swallowed  
  
Sorrowed   
  
I'm with everyone and yet not   
  
I'm with everyone and yet not   
  
I'm with everyone and yet\\   
  
  
"Do you think he knows?" I asked.   
  
"Who knows what?" he demanded. "No one knows anything. I don't know anything. I didn't kiss anyone."   
  
"Oh God," I sunk down in my chair. "He knows."   
  
  
//Just wanted to be myself   
  
Hey you said you would   
  
Love to try some   
  
Hey you said you would   
  
Love to die some   
  
In the middle of a world   
  
On a fishhook   
  
You're the wave   
  
You're the wave   
  
You're the wave\\ (   
  
  
"What's this song about?" Xander asked.   
  
I shrugged. "Oz loves it, I know that."   
  
"Maybe you're 'the wave' he's talking about."   
  
"Would that be a good thing?"   
  
  
//Swallowed   
  
Borrowed   
  
Heavy about everything but my love   
  
Swallowed  
Hollowed  
  
Sharp about everyone but yourself   
Swallowed   
  
Oh no   
  
I'm with everyone and yet not   
  
I'm with everyone and yet not   
  
I'm with everyone and you're not   
  
I'm with everyone and yet\\  
  
  
"I love you,"   
  
"Don't." I shake my head as though that'll make Xander go away. "Please don't. Let's just pretend it never happened and that it'll never happen again."   
  
"If it never happened, saying it'll never happen again doesn't make sense."   
  
"Huh?"   
  
"You think I don't pay attention in English class?"   
  
I gave him a Look.   
  
"Okay, so I don't, but Cordelia does and she told me that sentences need to make sense."   
  
"Duh."   
  
He reached over and touched my cheek but I jumped out of the chair.   
  
"You can't just do that. Oz! He's right up there!"   
  
"Oz is in the groove," he pointed. "Just spend five minutes with me in the hall."   
  
"What if Cordelia and Buffy come in?"   
  
"They'll have to wait until I'm done kissing you."   
  
//Piss on   
  
Self esteem   
  
Move forward   
  
Busted knee   
Sick head   
  
Blackened lungs   
  
And I'm a simple  
  
Selfish son\\   
  
  
"So?" he asked. "Yes, no, what?"   
  
I sighed. I looked at Oz, all in his music, and at Xander, all gorgeous in his tux.   
  
Suddenly, I felt like the room was closing in on me.   
  
  
//Got to get away from here  
  
Got to get away from here   
  
Got to get away from here   
  
Got to get away from here\\   
  
  
"Let's go," I pull him out into the hall, and I kiss him. And even though I love Xander, I love Oz. Something's missing when I'm with each of them, and I still don't know what it is.   
  
//Miss the one that I love a lot   
  
I miss the one that I love a lot   
  
I miss the one that I love a lot\\   
  
  
We go back into the dance and Oz is still playing. He smiles at me and I wave. Then he goes back to his music and I go back to trying to find out what's missing.


End file.
